Switch Mode

HMIME Chapter 12: The Most Incompetent Quack in History

Twenty strokes may not sound like much, but for the prisoner, it’s agonizing. In just a few minutes, the pain is excruciating. However, to bystanders, it quickly passes. As soon as the guard loosened his grip, Bai Lu staggered to his feet. Before he could catch his breath, Chu Ya charged over aggressively, seeming ready to fight him to the death.

Unfortunately, just as he took the first step, he accidentally stepped on a stone from who knows where. His feet slipped, and with a thud, he fell to the ground, his already battered buttocks slamming onto the hard blue stone floor!

“Ah…”

At that moment, everyone present couldn’t help but gasp in sympathy for this unlucky young nobleman. It was too pitiful, truly too pitiful. Even the gods would feel sorry for him. What sins had he committed in his past life?

“Ow!” Bai Lu winced in pain, his vision alternating between black and white. His life flashed before his eyes, and in a daze, he seemed to see his deceased mother beckoning to him from the Naihe Bridge.

In his final moments, he suddenly remembered a friend from his past life. That brother had broken his coccyx in a motorcycle accident and had to lie in bed for half a month. When Bai Lu visited him, he even patted his backside and mocked him for being useless. Now, thinking back, he realized he had been nothing short of a beast!

The Eunuch Wang hurriedly instructed the two guards, “Don’t just stand there, quickly help the young master down and administer medicine.”

Before the guards could move, they heard Chu Ya’s cold command, “No need, he’s resilient enough. Have him attend the night duty.”

After Chu Ya finished speaking, he turned and left without even glancing at Bai Lu, displaying the true demeanor of a ruthless emperor.

Once the Emperor had gone far, Captain Geng dared to approach, patting Bai Lu on the shoulder with concern. “Brother, accompanying the Emperor is like accompanying… cough! You’re not having an easy time, huh? Can your backside handle it?”

Bai Lu gritted his teeth, his face darkening. “Get lost!”

After beating him down and then sending him to attend to his injuries, even the slave owners would sigh, and the capitalists would shed tears.

As Bai Lu’s figure slowly receded, the Chief Eunuch stroked the duster in his arms and sighed softly, “The favor of the emperor’s family is not something anyone can bear. I only hope you have the fortune to endure this heavenly burden.”

Inside the Bailu Palace, the crescent moon hung high.

Bai Lu stood beside the wide dragon-carved bed with a cold expression. Leaning against the sandalwood bedpost, he silently stared at Chu Ya not far away.

Chu Ya sat in the Grand Teacher’s chair beside the tea table, his arms resting on the armrests as he tapped his fingers lightly on the wooden surface, lost in thought.

Although the bedroom was spacious and brightly lit, with the scent of sleep in the air, the atmosphere was tense, to the extreme.

Bai Lu shifted most of his weight onto the bedpost, relieving pressure on his legs. Just standing like this caused the wound on his backside to throb and ache again. He had to exert strong willpower to control his expression and not reveal his pain.

But he refused to show weakness and remained silent, not initiating conversation.

After a few minutes of this standoff, Chu Ya finally spoke up.

Bai Lu thought he was finally going to demand an explanation or order him to undress and get into bed. To his surprise, Chu Ya just casually said, “If you’re tired, you can sit down.”

“…Sit???”
Bai Lu gritted his teeth and said word by word, “You’re doing this on purpose!”

“Hmm?” Chu Ya frowned slightly, then suddenly understood, “Oh, sorry, I forgot. It must be painful to stand like this, right?”

Bai Lu growled, “Can’t you stop being so sneaky? You’ve already beaten me. Can’t you have some conscience as the main culprit?”

He really hated Chu Ya for this. If you want to be a villain, be a thorough one. Don’t hit with a stick and then offer candy, making him feel uncomfortable inside.

“I have my reasons.”

Chu Ya looked at him calmly, “A-bai, when you tried to escape, I was indeed angry. But that’s not the main reason for beating you. You should understand that it’s not the 21st century anymore. You must learn to abide by the rules of the palace. If they hadn’t recognized you at the time, do you know what your fate would have been?”

In an instant, memories flooded Bai Lu’s mind: the screams, the smell of blood in the air, and saw Chu Ya smiling as he casually wiped the blood from his hands.

The Imperial Court, where punishment is administered without regard for life or death, is a cruel and terrifying place for palace servants.

A chill crept up his spine like a damp vine, chilling him to the bone. Bai Lu’s complexion turned pale, and he awkwardly averted his gaze.

“Now you’re scared? Twenty strokes were light; only pain can make you remember.”

Bai Lu stubbornly remained silent, refusing to admit his fault.

Chu Ya sighed softly, “This was just a small punishment for a big warning. Next time won’t be so easy. Take off your clothes and get into bed.”

Bai Lu’s eyes widened in shock. “Even in this condition, you still want to…?”

“…What are you thinking? Take off your clothes so I can apply medicine.”

Chu Ya’s gaze was calm, with a hint of teasing. He scanned Bai Lu from head to toe as if he could see through the clothes. He chuckled, “Don’t worry, we’ll take our time when your wounds heal.”

Bai Lu felt exasperated. “Who’s in a hurry? Who wants to do that?!”

Chu Ya: “…”

Chu Ya didn’t bother arguing with him anymore. With a serious expression, he commanded, “Get into bed.”

The imposing demeanor of an emperor made Bai Lu feel nervous. His throat felt dry, and he muttered under his breath, “Fine, whatever, you’re the boss.”

He obediently turned around and, using both hands and feet, climbed onto the dragon bed. Enduring the pain in his buttocks, he grabbed a pillow and found a comfortable position to lie down.

Chu Ya approached with several small bottles of medicine. Peering down, he saw Bai Lu burying half of his face in the pillow, murmuring something unintelligible. Chu Ya strained to listen and vaguely made out curses. Definitely not pleasant words.

But when Bai Lu caught sight of Chu Ya approaching, he immediately clamped his mouth shut and averted his gaze, as if afraid to meet his eyes.

Even a boxer who had fought bloody battles in the ring feared getting beaten up. Look at that, he’s behaving so obediently now. Chu Ya thought this tactic was quite effective. A few spanks won’t hurt his muscles and bones, maybe I should use it more often.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Chu Ya lifted Bai Lu’s black outer garment, revealing the hem of his undergarment. He placed his fingers on the waistband and pulled it down mercilessly.

The blood on his skin had already congealed, and the wound was stuck to the fabric. When Chu Ya forcefully removed it, it was like tearing open half-healed scars.

Bai Lu cried out in pain, then bit down on the soft pillow, squeezing out two harsh words from between his teeth: “Incompetent doctor!”

Chu Ya couldn’t help but smile again, gently patting Bai Lu’s back as if comforting him, then leaning down to kiss his earlobe, half-true and half-fake, “I suppose the imperial physicians are much better than my methods. If you’re willing to let those old men look at your backside, I can call them.”

Bai Lu felt defeated and resigned. He simply buried his entire face in the pillow. “Do whatever you want, consider me dead.”

Chu Ya couldn’t help but chuckle again, softly coaxing, “I’ll be gentler.”

Dipping his fingers into a sparkling ointment, he applied it evenly and gently to the swollen scars. For the broken skin and bleeding areas, he sprinkled some powdered medicine. Perhaps these were all herbal concoctions, with gentle properties. Bai Lu hardly felt any pain after that.

After applying the medicine, Chu Ya pulled up the light and fluffy silk quilt to cover Bai Lu, then used a handkerchief to wipe off the medicine powder from his fingertips. He said, “There’s still some time before dawn. Close your eyes and get some rest.”

With the pain relieved and drowsiness setting in, Bai Lu lay on the bed, clutching the soft pillow, and drifted off to sleep.

In a half-awake state, he seemed to hear someone whispering softly in his ear:

As long as you’re willing to stay, I’ll treat you well.

But by then, Bai Lu’s consciousness was fading, and he couldn’t discern whether it was a dream or a whisper from the real world.

Can’t wait for the next chapter? Subscribe to the advanced chapters membership on Abyss' Kofi and get access to up to 10 chapters ahead! If you love what Abyss is doing, then consider showing your support by donating a cup of 𝐤𝐨-𝐟𝐢.

Comment

  1. Xiao says:

    Where did the mandarin lessons go?

  2. abyss says:

    I didn't realize anyone's actually enjoying them lol. I will bring them back 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

error: Content is protected !!

Options

not work with dark mode
Reset