HMIME Chapter 4: Do you dislike me?

So hot, yet so cold…

In a daze, Bai Lu felt that his body was uncomfortably hot at one moment, and shivering at the next. His face seemed to be covered with a layer of heat that would not dissipate, while his back and shoulders felt chilly.

His body felt heavy as if burdened by a nightmare. His limbs were numb and weak, unable to rise. His head throbbed, and he couldn’t seem to open his eyes.

This uncomfortable sensation was something Bai Lu hadn’t experienced in years. He was fond of exercising
and had kept his body in good shape. Even after starting to fight in the arena for money, despite frequent injuries and bleeding, he hardly ever fell ill. Occasionally, he’d catch a cold, but a few laps of sweating it out usually did the trick.

He vaguely remembered the last time he had a fever; he was eleven or twelve years old, back when his mother was still alive… Come to think of it, perhaps the reason he used to fall ill frequently as a child was because someone was taking care of him, so he became careless.

But as he grew up, he dared not get sick anymore. Even if he lay bedridden, no one would care for him.

And now, here he was, sick again, and it seemed quite serious. Bai Lu grumbled inwardly at Lin Xiao’an, why didn’t he exercise properly and become a healthy young man of the new era? His poor physique left him in such a mess.

There probably wouldn’t be anyone to care for him now, so he might as well just die of this illness.

Bai Lu’s mind wandered in a haze of half-sleep, half-consciousness. Suddenly, he felt something cool and soft touch his forehead, somewhat
comforting, but it quickly moved away.

Bai Lu couldn’t help but turn his head to search for it, brushing against the cool object. When it moved away again, he was annoyed. Just then, he heard a familiar voice in his ear. Perhaps due to the fever, the voice sounded distant yet near, ethereal yet serene.

“Don’t make trouble. I’ll give it to you after I change the water.”

Bai Lu struggled to think: Water? What water? Ah… I see, he wants to drown me!

With a jolt, Bai Lu suddenly woke up, hastily opening his eyes. The first thing he saw was the dark golden veil hanging from above, exquisitely crafted with intricate dragon patterns embroidered on it. Next to the veil was an antique bed frame, and he was covered with a
thick goose quilt, with a soft pillow behind his head.

Outside the window, it was pitch black, with only a few stars shining faintly. Inside the room, bright candlelight flickered—he actually slept from morning to dusk, no wonder he was so hungry. Chu Ya was sitting by the bed, carefully wringing out the water from a towel, preparing to apply it to Bai Lu’s forehead when he realized that Bai Lu had already opened his eyes.

Chu Ya wiped the sweat from his feverish face with the towel, asking softly, “How do you feel?”

Bai Lu closed his eyes and replied weakly, “Seeing you makes me feel even sicker.”

“…”

Chu Ya was not angry, and calmly wiping the cold sweat from Bai Lu’s face, he washed the towel clean and draped it over Bai Lu’s forehead,
saying casually, “There is nothing you can do if you don’t want to look at me. Now, except for me, Who else will take care of you?”

They had inexplicably arrived in this world with vastly different identities. Although their statuses were vastly different, with Chu Ya reigning
supreme and holding great power, in a certain sense, they only had each other.

Chu Ya instructed a maid to bring in the freshly brewed medicinal soup, stirring it with a spoon to cool it down before
intending to feed it to Bai Lu. Bai Lu leaned against the headboard, watching him warily. “You drink first.”

Chu Ya’s gaze darkened, his voice turning cold. “If I wanted to harm you, I could have just let you die in the dungeon. Do I need to poison you?”

“I dislike the bitterness. You try it first,” Bai Lu said succinctly.

“…”

Without saying a word, Chu Ya reached out and grabbed Bai Lu’s chin, and poured a bowl of bitter medicine directly into him.

“Damn it! It’s so bitter! cough, cough…”

Chu Ya calmly set down the bowl, wiped his hands with a silk handkerchief, then took some candied fruit from the plate prepared earlier and stuffed it into Bai Lu’s mouth.

Bai Lu chewed and nodded. “This taste is alright. Do you have to take care of patients like this? Do you dislike me?”

Chu Ya replied blandly, “You also hate me, don’t you?”

Between them lay a deep-seated blood feud, and after experiencing the incident on the ship, every time they met, a few words exchanged would inevitably lead to a tense atmosphere, as if they were about to fight at any
moment.

Bai Lu glared at him coldly. “If I had the strength right now, I would have gotten up and beaten you already.”

Suddenly, he remembered something and couldn’t help but gloat. “Since you crossed over, does that mean you’re dead too?”

“Perhaps later than you,” Chu Ya’s eyes became obscure under the candlelight, unclear whether there was resentment within them. “To find you, I spent three hours in the sea. When I woke up again, I was here.”

Bai Lu sneered, “Thanks to that shot from Young Master Chu, I struggled for less than five minutes before kicking the bucket.”

“Do you think it’s my fault?” Chu Ya’s tone remained unchanged, but his gaze became fierce, as if he were slicing a piece of flesh from Bai Lu,
leaving him in silence. “Deceiving my feelings for three years, all just to take my father’s life?”

“I once…” Chu Ya’s voice suddenly stopped, his gaze softened slightly as he carefully caressed Bai Lu’s
cheek. “I once… liked you so much.”

But I hate you…

Bai Lu closed his eyes, unable to avoid recalling the painful memories.

He was a bastard child, his father passing away before his birth, leaving his mother to struggle to survive. Such a good person, yet ruined by Chu Shen, Chu Ya’s biological father, that powerful man who played with people’s lives.

Bai Lu knew the lesson of not hating one’s family, but he couldn’t help it. He hated Chu Shen, everyone from the
Chu family, every name etched in blood and hatred, deeply engraved in Bai Lu’s heart.

So when he met Chu Ya by chance, he immediately conceived the idea of ​​using him for revenge.

Bai Lu pretended to love him for three years, gaining access to the unattainable Chu family circle, getting close to Chu Shen, intending to
find an opportunity to deal with him. Unfortunately, he hesitated and failed to kill him.

So Chu Ya has every reason to hate him. He deceived his emotions for three years, and caused his father to end up in the ICU. It was only fair that he took that shot.

Bai Lu didn’t care about that shot, but he couldn’t get over his mother’s obstacle. He hated everyone in the Chu family!

“Do you hate me?” Chu Ya seemed to sense Bai Lu’s thoughts, gently pinching Bai Lu’s soft earlobe with his thumb and index finger, meeting his forehead, whispering as lovers do:

“It was Chu Shen who killed your mother. I was only a teenager at the time and didn’t even know about it… Did you feel no guilt during those
three years of deceiving me? Was there no sincerity towards me?”

Bai Lu seemed to be paralyzed as if under a spell, suddenly stiffening and unable to move.

Perhaps his mind was clouded, as uncontrollable memories replayed in his head: the warm conversations in the soft glow of the lamps, the chaotic cooking in the kitchen, the carefully prepared gifts for holidays, and even the intimate moments in bed at night.

“…I truly liked you. I promise, you were my first love.”

“Stop joking. How could the noble young master of a prominent family like you not have been in love by his twenties?”

“It’s true, A Bai. You were my first and will be my last.”

“Nonsense.”

“I want to marry you. shall we get married abroad?”

“You’re dreaming… You haven’t even bought the engagement ring yet.”

“I’ll buy it tomorrow. I want to introduce you to my family first. They will accept you.”

“…Alright.”

Bai Lu closed his eyes, returning from the past to reality. He stared directly into Chu Ya’s profound eyes and slowly spoke, “No, not at all.”

The night wind blew through the window, passing through the corridor, the candlelight flickered, as if something had suddenly shattered in the dark night, without a sound. Something warm had turned cold and fallen into a frigid abyss.

Afterward, Chu Ya looked at him expressionlessly. “…Alright.”

“Alright then…”

He raised his hand to press Bai Lu onto the soft bed, effortlessly suppressing all of his struggles, and untied the silk belt around his
waist in front of Bai Lu’s helpless eyes.

“Since this is what you want, then I have no choice.” Chu Ya looked down at him from above, firmly holding his delicate wrists, kissed his Adam’s apple with a mixture of coldness and gentleness.

“Do you know why I am the emperor, while you are just a lowly male servant? Because in this lifetime, you are here to repay a debt,
blood for blood.”
 

T/N: Chu Ya…..fever….Bai Lu???? why do these characters like doing it in fever lol

anyways day 2 of learning mandarin – 埜 yě (field/wilderness) where small forests 林 grow on the open ground 土